I wasn't going to say anything concerning the recent events. I was going to bite my tongue. Let it go. But I just can't do that anymore. I have to get it out. Even if no one reads this blog, at least I'll get these thoughts out of my mind. And since I can't sleep, here I am.
There has been so much hate, so much violence, so much wrong with our world lately. I'm afraid I don't even know where to start. I was having a conversation with my mom the other day, wondering about the state of this world. Wondering what is the point of it all? Is it worth it? Is this the type of world I want to raise my son in?
No. I don't want to raise my son in a world where there are more mass shootings than there are days in the year. There is absolutely no reason this needs to continue to happen. None. Laws can be changed without infringing on your rights.
Let's start with assault weapons. What is the point of owning an assault weapon? There is none. What is the point of having 4000 rounds of ammunition on stockpile at home? There is none. What is the point of having 300 guns? There is none. These are not necessities. These are dangers that we can avoid.
I've read about comparing gun rights to the right to drive a car. You have to take a course, pass tests, be responsible, continue to renew your license, etc. Why can't we do this with guns? Because guns are a constitutional right? So was the right to own a person. We don't do that any more. No one wants to take away all the damn guns. We only want to take away the extreme weapons that have no value in our communities. We only want to keep guns out of criminals' or dangerous individuals' hands. If you are a responsible gun owner, you have nothing to fear. Except maybe some more training but how has that ever hurt anyone?
There are so many double standards out there... terrorist versus mentally ill; Christian versus Muslim; guns versus adoptions. So let's talk about them.
Terrorist versus mentally ill. It's a racial thing, right? If it's a white guy - he must be mentally ill. A loner. If it's anyone else, he's a terrorist, a thug. I think they're all the same - dangerous individuals who should not have had access to the weapons they did. I'm not saying that there isn't mental illness involved in some or all of these individuals, because that is a very likely thing. But here's the next double standard - we start talking about improving our mental health system and say that will make a difference. And it might. But are those politicians claiming we need to revamp mental health going to be okay with a so call "handout"? I'm guessing not as they're currently trying to repeal health care for so many Americans.
Christian versus Muslim. If one Muslim goes on a shooting rampage, we need to start tracking all Muslims or get them out of our nation. If one Christian goes on a shooting rampage, well, we already determined he's just mentally ill. You cannot judge an entire religion based on the actions of a few individuals. A few radicals. And if you do want to do that, you need to judge all religions equally. There is so much hate against any religion that isn't Christianity in America. And this needs to stop. America was NOT founded on Christianity. It was founded on FREEDOM of RELIGION. Meaning you decide what YOUR religion is. You don't force it on others and others don't force their religion on you. It's part of what makes America great - our diversity. There is separation of church and state for a reason. We need to keep it that way. I am a proud Christian and you will never hear me say otherwise. But I know not everyone is Christian. And that is okay. I'm happy to share my faith with you if you want, but I will not force it on anyone.
To take that one step further, there's been a lot of talk about thoughts and prayers during these horrible events. No one is saying you can't send your thoughts and prayers to the families and communities that are experiencing these tragedies. By all means, send thoughts and prayers. Send thoughts and prayers of healing and comfort. But do more. Send thoughts and prayers about change to make this country a better place. Turn your thoughts and prayers into action. No one is denying your faith or your ability to practice that. But we need action. We need change. We need to realize that we don't have to live like this. And that can only come from action.
Guns versus abortions. Oh this is a fun one. So many are outraged at all the babies that are killed each year. Ironically, they don't seem as concerned for people that are also murdered in shootings each year. I'm not going to give you my stance on abortion because frankly, I'm not even sure what it is. But what I do know is that no woman makes that choice easily. I can't imagine the struggle that is. What I do know is that that choice should be made only by that woman. No one else. No one else could possibly know how difficult that choice is. And if you start to tell me that she can give it up for adoption and that that baby isn't even given a chance at life, let's talk about the children that are currently in the foster systems, waiting to be adopted. Let's talk about the children that so poor that they don't eat when they're not in school. If you want to care about life, let's start with the lives of the children we currently have in this country. There are plenty here to help first. If we can solve those issues, maybe then we can have a serious conversation about abortion.
One Congresswoman recently introduced a bill trying to regulate guns like certain politicians want to regulate abortions - 72 hour waiting period, gruesome videos, doctor's note, etc. Not that it will ever pass, but it brings up such a great point! Why do we regulate women's bodies so much but not guns? I believe it was Senator Paul who recently said he was against closing a loophole for suspected terrorists to be able to buy guns because it would infringe against their rights. It's okay if we don't let them fly, but go ahead and buy some guns. Makes sense. Oh and by the way, let's go ahead and track all those individuals of Muslim faith because there might be a small percentage of terrorists but hey, they can still have guns.
There are too many double standards. Too much hate. Too much violence.
I don't have all the answers. I'm not an expert. But I refuse to believe that there is nothing we can do to help prevent these tragedies. Will criminals still find a way to get guns? Maybe. But with more laws in place, more registries, more background checks, we might be able to make it harder and prevent some.
Friday, December 18, 2015
Friday, May 29, 2015
The American Dream...?
I realized that I haven't written on this blog for a long time. Don't get me wrong, I've definitely had thoughts in the past couple of years regarding politics, but life gets in the way. But I've had some thoughts on my mind lately that I can't seem to shake. So I thought if I got them down here, maybe that would help.
I've been thinking a lot about the 'American Dream'. You know what it is. You know what your dream is. It's different for every person, but similar for everyone. The American Dream is you work hard, you become successful. You have a job, a family, a house. It's what we're taught growing up. Work hard, be successful.
Well lately, I feel like there is no such thing as the American Dream. It doesn't exist. Maybe it did at one time, but not anymore. See, all my life, I thought all I had to do was work hard, go to school, get a degree, get a job and I'll be set. Even throughout college when I started to get glimpses of "real life", I was still confident.
But now I'm out in the real world. I've been here for five plus years, which I realize isn't a huge amount of time. But in those five years, I feel like the American Dream that I once pictured is not attainable.
To start, my husband and I have both have a variety of jobs in the past few years. This has been due to moving or new opportunities. I think we're both still struggling to find that perfect job for us. But we have been fortunate to find work, even if it hasn't always been doing what we went to school for or what we want to be doing with our lives. We've also been fortunate that these have been above minimum wage jobs. However, due to the varying circumstances, we haven't been able to stay at a job long enough to really feel the benefits of long term employment, i.e. significant raises. But again, this is on us as we chose to move or try our hand at something new.
We can also speak to the fact of the different types of employers there are. Public versus private. Corporation versus small business. There are a lot of differences. And there are certainly pros and cons to both. Is any one better than another? That all depends. One thing is for sure, there is no one set way to run a business. I suppose I could go on here about the differences of maternity and parental benefits as well, but that's probably best left for another post... :)
One of the biggest aspects of the American Dream is owning your own home. This is a big one. And when I think about owning my own home, I wonder if it's possible. I wonder how other people my age (okay, not so much anymore as I did five years ago) can own a home. One of problems for us personally is again the moving. We haven't found that right place to settle down and call home. And I don't want to start the process of buying a home to just have to turn around and sell it in a year or two. So we rent. We've rented a lot of different places - big, small; nice, not so nice. But a home is the dream. But is it possible? And the reason I question this so much is due to my next point.
Debt. My husband and I are both under 30 years old. And we have so much debt. I will own up to the fact that some of it is due to young stupidity when we first graduated from college. But most of it is student loan debt.
I'm sure some of you are thinking, "Well you chose to go to a private school, you should have known what you were getting into". And maybe there is some truth to that. But when I was picking colleges, I was only thinking about the next four years and what that experience would be. We were told that you needed a college degree to get a good job and that there were plenty waiting. Well I gradated college 2008, right during the financial crisis. There weren't as many jobs. It was a different world then when I started four years earlier. No one goes to college and thinks, "hm, I think I'll rack up a bunch of debt, should be fun". And you know, I take responsibility for that debt. It was my choice to go to a private school and I will be the one to pay back those loans.
But, there is a huge problem with student loans. There is very little help, very little assistance in repaying student loans. If you are fortunate enough to have federal loans, you're going to be a little better off. But you're only allowed so much in federal loans before you have to go private. And when you private, you get screwed over.
So as I've already mentioned, we've moved around a lot and had a variety of jobs. Our incomes have also varied because of these, along with some other circumstances. We've tried to do the right thing and continue to make payments on our loans so we call for assistance. As a reminder, most of our student loans are private and not federal. Our best option was to go on the graduate level repayment, which basically means we're still paying on the interest of the loan but that's it. And because of that, the total of the loan is actually increasing!
How is it that when we're trying to be responsible and still pay on the loan, but can't afford the regular monthly payment, we're being punished? Why can't there be a repayment option that helps pay towards the loan itself while being affordable according to our income? I'm not even asking for loan forgiveness. I realize these are our loans and our responsibility. But I would like there to be some regulation in place not to punish loan holders when trying to pay back loans! Help us make payments affordable that actually go to help pay off the loan and not the ridiculous amount of interest. Right now, our student loan debt is about a third of our income.
Could we be doing more ourselves? Could we be working second jobs? Cutting coupons or eating out less? Cutting costs across the board so we can throw some more pennies towards our loans? Maybe. But I don't believe the American Dream was about pinching pennies to make things work. Why can't both of us work one full time job and be able to make affordable payments towards our debt?
Believe me, I've considered a second job though. Many times. But with a husband that already works 40+ hours that vary each week, it would be hard for him to have a second job. And that leaves me at home with our son. And if I got a second job, someone would need to watch him and then I'd have to wonder if the income from that second job would just go towards paying the babysitter. And sure, there are a lot of those work from home businesses selling different things, but I think I would have a hard time asking my friends for money to buy things when I know a lot of them are in the same situation we're in.
So when I think about my American Dream right now, I think about owning a home and being debt free by the time we retire. And that's not right. That's not the American Dream I was taught about as a kid.
And before I post this, I realize that some people will probably see this as a big entitlement post. And that's not what I'm saying. I'm not asking for my debt to disappear or be forgiven. I'm asking that repayment, especially in private loans, not be so difficult. That there's some relief in how student loans are treated. Is that really so hard?
I've been thinking a lot about the 'American Dream'. You know what it is. You know what your dream is. It's different for every person, but similar for everyone. The American Dream is you work hard, you become successful. You have a job, a family, a house. It's what we're taught growing up. Work hard, be successful.
Well lately, I feel like there is no such thing as the American Dream. It doesn't exist. Maybe it did at one time, but not anymore. See, all my life, I thought all I had to do was work hard, go to school, get a degree, get a job and I'll be set. Even throughout college when I started to get glimpses of "real life", I was still confident.
But now I'm out in the real world. I've been here for five plus years, which I realize isn't a huge amount of time. But in those five years, I feel like the American Dream that I once pictured is not attainable.
To start, my husband and I have both have a variety of jobs in the past few years. This has been due to moving or new opportunities. I think we're both still struggling to find that perfect job for us. But we have been fortunate to find work, even if it hasn't always been doing what we went to school for or what we want to be doing with our lives. We've also been fortunate that these have been above minimum wage jobs. However, due to the varying circumstances, we haven't been able to stay at a job long enough to really feel the benefits of long term employment, i.e. significant raises. But again, this is on us as we chose to move or try our hand at something new.
We can also speak to the fact of the different types of employers there are. Public versus private. Corporation versus small business. There are a lot of differences. And there are certainly pros and cons to both. Is any one better than another? That all depends. One thing is for sure, there is no one set way to run a business. I suppose I could go on here about the differences of maternity and parental benefits as well, but that's probably best left for another post... :)
One of the biggest aspects of the American Dream is owning your own home. This is a big one. And when I think about owning my own home, I wonder if it's possible. I wonder how other people my age (okay, not so much anymore as I did five years ago) can own a home. One of problems for us personally is again the moving. We haven't found that right place to settle down and call home. And I don't want to start the process of buying a home to just have to turn around and sell it in a year or two. So we rent. We've rented a lot of different places - big, small; nice, not so nice. But a home is the dream. But is it possible? And the reason I question this so much is due to my next point.
Debt. My husband and I are both under 30 years old. And we have so much debt. I will own up to the fact that some of it is due to young stupidity when we first graduated from college. But most of it is student loan debt.
I'm sure some of you are thinking, "Well you chose to go to a private school, you should have known what you were getting into". And maybe there is some truth to that. But when I was picking colleges, I was only thinking about the next four years and what that experience would be. We were told that you needed a college degree to get a good job and that there were plenty waiting. Well I gradated college 2008, right during the financial crisis. There weren't as many jobs. It was a different world then when I started four years earlier. No one goes to college and thinks, "hm, I think I'll rack up a bunch of debt, should be fun". And you know, I take responsibility for that debt. It was my choice to go to a private school and I will be the one to pay back those loans.
But, there is a huge problem with student loans. There is very little help, very little assistance in repaying student loans. If you are fortunate enough to have federal loans, you're going to be a little better off. But you're only allowed so much in federal loans before you have to go private. And when you private, you get screwed over.
So as I've already mentioned, we've moved around a lot and had a variety of jobs. Our incomes have also varied because of these, along with some other circumstances. We've tried to do the right thing and continue to make payments on our loans so we call for assistance. As a reminder, most of our student loans are private and not federal. Our best option was to go on the graduate level repayment, which basically means we're still paying on the interest of the loan but that's it. And because of that, the total of the loan is actually increasing!
How is it that when we're trying to be responsible and still pay on the loan, but can't afford the regular monthly payment, we're being punished? Why can't there be a repayment option that helps pay towards the loan itself while being affordable according to our income? I'm not even asking for loan forgiveness. I realize these are our loans and our responsibility. But I would like there to be some regulation in place not to punish loan holders when trying to pay back loans! Help us make payments affordable that actually go to help pay off the loan and not the ridiculous amount of interest. Right now, our student loan debt is about a third of our income.
Could we be doing more ourselves? Could we be working second jobs? Cutting coupons or eating out less? Cutting costs across the board so we can throw some more pennies towards our loans? Maybe. But I don't believe the American Dream was about pinching pennies to make things work. Why can't both of us work one full time job and be able to make affordable payments towards our debt?
Believe me, I've considered a second job though. Many times. But with a husband that already works 40+ hours that vary each week, it would be hard for him to have a second job. And that leaves me at home with our son. And if I got a second job, someone would need to watch him and then I'd have to wonder if the income from that second job would just go towards paying the babysitter. And sure, there are a lot of those work from home businesses selling different things, but I think I would have a hard time asking my friends for money to buy things when I know a lot of them are in the same situation we're in.
So when I think about my American Dream right now, I think about owning a home and being debt free by the time we retire. And that's not right. That's not the American Dream I was taught about as a kid.
And before I post this, I realize that some people will probably see this as a big entitlement post. And that's not what I'm saying. I'm not asking for my debt to disappear or be forgiven. I'm asking that repayment, especially in private loans, not be so difficult. That there's some relief in how student loans are treated. Is that really so hard?
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